A place about forgotten.

I entered a place tonight I haven't been in a long time. Maybe because of being tired or due to the weekend of Valentine. On the way home from church tonight a loneliness set in that had not visited my heart in a long while. I felt a deep desire for companionship and to be met at the door with a smile, to cuddle on the couch with the silence of a mouse and to just sat their with the "One" in my arms. As I drove in the driveway one of my triggers fired a shot. It is the "Front Door", a locked door and behind there are no lights on in the house. as it is unlocked there is not a noise and the smell of food on the stove, no sweet smell that a lady lives in the home. Yes, these days use to be long and wide and brought many tears to my eyes. As I sit here and write in the sounds of the night, I must say that the future yet looks so bright. Yes, that is right because at the end of this dark tunnel there is a light, it is my Savior who is that light HE came to me flight. "I will never leave you alone" is what he said.

I use the word "HALT" to help me meet the days like this.

H --- When hungry and does not just mean food.
A --- When angry even at self too.
L --- When Lonely
T --- When tired

You should stop and make no decisions because when emotions are aroused intellect stops working and bad decisions will be made.

So I "HALT", I write this to remind myself to not allow emotions to direct my life. Emotions are wonderful and this has been a week of felt ones so sweet, friendship, companionship and beauty. Days will be full in days to come they just seem empty tonight on the run. I miss my son most of all and would hold him if only he was here tonight but another day will come when it will be filled with such fun.

Thank you my friends for allowing me to be open and honest. This is one of the ways I deal with this life. I have learned to write but if not shared it just seems to hit empty air.