ceiling snacks

the pain of divorce #2

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the Pain of Divorce

I knocked on the door of marriage

I knocked on the door of marriage and heard forever and opened door and had not expected to found divorce. My emotions went wild and my heart did fail but my soul said wait, because Jesus stands at the gate. The gate was beautiful for in HIM I did see forever I will love you and I will never leave, at this gate I found peace, love and contentment. Yes, there is hope beyond divorce when it is Jesus, who becomes your choice. Do I still hope for restoration of that vowed day, oh yes, because it is Jesus who is still walks that way. If I am to follow HIM through my day then this is road to travel and not to stray away.

steps

Friday night pizza and a movie with the fire place on now that's the life for me. I realize that things might not be where I want them to be but this one thing I do now is the steps of a good man are ordered by the LORD and am that good man and I am listening.

m\My Wonderful Son

My Wonderful Aaron Slideshow: Kem’s trip from Cartersville, Georgia, United States to Ducktown, Tennessee was created by TripAdvisor. See another Ducktown slideshow. Create your own stunning slideshow with our free photo slideshow maker.

No Greater Joy

I am crucified with Christ: nevertheless I live; yet not I, but Christ liveth in me: and the life which I now live in the flesh I live by the faith of the Son of God, who loved me, and gave himself for me. Galatians 2:20 (KJV)

I find it to be no greater joy than to die. I have fought with feelings of my wife leaving and the idea of would she return, though I can not blame her nor could we anyone with the world pleading for us to go after our own desires. The world says you deserve to be and do and feel and live and dream however you want. This is why we have the problems today that men have followed their heart and their heart was after self and not Christ. Death is the only cure for this problem, NO, not of life but of "self". "I am crucified", can we say this.

"I desire" to be loved and to love and yet there is nothing wrong with that. The problem is and many may disagree but the truth is still the truth, "I" if I am going to be where FATHER would have me, "I" must die to the desire other than "restoration" of a broken marriage. I see it this way, if JESUS was standing in front of me and I asked should I seek a relationship with another or seek restoration even if the other desire not restoration. I have no doubt as to HIS answer. It is in this that "I" must die, for "I" am a man and desire but I have found that If I trust HIM, HE will give me the desires of my heart (Proverbs 3:5-6). Life is so much more fulfilling when we live in HIM and allow HIM to live through us.

The best love is because love, I love you just because. No reason, just because.

written when in high school:

To be loved is something we all seek.

It is something we can not cause to happen,

and the more we try to cause it to happen the lonelier inside we feel.

Love is not emotions but yet it is emotions.

It's hard to explain and yet has no true definition.

It can't be seen nor touched and some would say it can be felt,

but as a feeling it may go away.

love is known and there is no doubt or question if or if not you love someone

you just seem to know.

The best love is because love, I love you just because. No reason, just because.

JUST BECAUSE LOVE

On Nov. 18, 2008, my life changed, my wife of 20 years walked away and I did not even see it coming. When you start out you have doubts whether you will make it but when you cross time and trails together and hit 7 yrs, than 10, than 15, then 18 you just believe you will have a life time together. In those 20 years there had never been a time of separation or leaving over night to go to a parents house because we were mad at each other, there had not been as far as I can remember even sleeping in another room because of being mad, no calls were ever made to the police because of fighting, I don't even remember fighting, yes, we had times that we didn't agree but we worked through it. The question even after these 3 years is what went wrong.

One thing is I believe we drifted apart, when you're drifting you're just enjoying yourself and may not even realize what is going on. I was enjoying marriage and in a selfish manner did not realize that she was not. In one sense, you can't expect someone to make you enjoy something, I like ice cream but not all people do, so just because I like it doesn't mean I should just take it for granted that everyone around me does, but if you don't like ice cream tell me, for if you don't tell me I want know. She never told me she was not enjoying it.

A professor in school said, "When emotions are aroused intelligent stops working", my emotions were aroused, I was in love and failed to see after 20 years she was not. They say you can't fall out of love and maybe that is true but I do know, at one time she loved me but some where whether my fault or hers she stopped loving me. Even today my love for her is the same as it was when she was here. Some people ask me how can you love her after what she did to you and I can answer that, "It was because love", that is, "JUST BECAUSE LOVE", I love her just because I decided too not based on her but on me. Many people today don't understand "JUST BECAUSE LOVE" but that is the kind of love that my GOD has for me, it is based on HIM and HIS character. I guess if I want to be like HIM I should love the way HE does. Judge me for loving someone who no longer loves me and say I am wrong but I know ONE who will say "great job, Kem" one day when I see HIM face to face. Yes, I believe that I will see my FATHER face to face one day and maybe not that long from now and because of that I must do what pleases HIM.

This may sound a little strange because of what I just said but please hear me out. I do believe I have been living as FATHER would have me with a mind set for restoration which is the only plan HE has for me and my family but I have come to realize that I have also dishonored HIM in my outlook on life. Content is what HE wants and I have not been content. I lived for 20 years as a married man, I talked like a married man, walked like a married man, I thought like a married man, I came home like a married man, managed money like a married man, dreamed like a married man and had goals like a married man, the reason was I was a married man. For the last three years nothing has changed other than I am no longer married but I still live like a married man. To have the mind set of a married man and yet not have the benefits that come along with being married will cause one to be lonely, discouraged and depressed. Married in mind only will make you a lonely person.

In the recent days FATHER has worked on me. The verse "as a man thinketh so is he" has dominated my mind as if FATHER has been knocking away at my heart. I am not married but single and must accept that. I need to begin to live with the mind set of a single man but yet with limits. Now, hold up, that doesn't mean I can forget the Word of GOD on these matters but what it does mean is I can let go and learn to live with where I am at this time in my life. Now I don't know where HE is leading me on this path but I do know this as long as I follow HIM I want get lost.

So now I begin a new path, a new way of thinking, a new outlook, a new adventure, a new joy with a new zeal for life that can bring glory to the ONE who loves me JUST BECAUSE!!!!!

restoration comes after the sack cloth is removed.

Kem G. Lowery (1): "I believe it is time to take off the sack cloth and put on the silk. I have lived the past few year with sack cloth on because of things that I did not choose, I do not believe my FATHER wants me to live in a spirit of morning and sack cloth when through HIM I am part of a royal family and deserve silk. David the king when his child died removed the cloth and ate. I must accept the death of the past and live today"

There was an old man that lived alone because one day he had lost his song.

There was an old man that lived alone because one day he had lost his song.

He had had his song so vary long and thought, never would it ever roam but

to his dismay the song left one day.

He looked around to find the song but it had moved and was gone.

He had loved this song for so vary long that to lose it, he wondered what had gone wrong.

He missed his song and had said that he would never sing another song for this song alone had sat upon his heart’s throne.

He mourned and cried and thought he would die. With every tear in his eye beside his bed he sighed.

He had noticed other songs but they just did not have the right tone.

There was one that was a young song that had tipped toed across his throne but it too was not his tone. He missed the young song but knew she would find a better song for her throne.

He had learned to miss his song and to live his life alone, even though the joy of his life was gone because of the loss of his song, the little song that they wrote together would always make him feel much better.

This little song had such a sweet tone that it made everyone want to sing alone. The little song lived not at home but long long long which made the man moan.

The man had hope that his little song would one day be home and both could sing along with a new song where neither would ever have to roam and be alone.